You what what? It feels good to let the past go & have compassion for those that hurt you. I feel good about letting go of the negative feelings around my real father (RLT) & brother. I've gotten to a place where I truly feel compassion for them - I feel sorry for them. It's very sad that they hold grudges, cannot let go and fill their lives with "stuff" so they don't really have to feel real feelings. (Funny thing is, I know they'd "say" they've let it go though.)
I have reached out contacting RLT. Most recently, I reached out around Father's day because I was so perplexed as to if I should contact him or not. So I decided to tell him that. I'm sure you can guess.....he didn't respond. Shocker, huh!
What on God's earth am I supposed to think? So, as much as he can make up the "truth" in his mind, I can believe he no longer loves me & doesn't need me in his life. And as I've communicated, it's truly his loss. If you don't communicate, I see that as rejection. Thanks RLT!
Here's the funny thing: his father treated him the same way (as I was told by my mom). So I wonder what he thought when his father was giving him the 7th grade silent treatment. Does RLT ever consider the way he felt & that repeating that does no good? Does he ever think about the legacy of a unhealthy family he has created & is leaving. (His son is BEYOND dysfunctional.) Does this messed up situation make him proud? Does having a relationship with 50% of his kids and only 1 of 5 grandkids make him proud? Gosh forbid I call the elephant in the room but does a man in his 80's self reflect?
I guess RLT can say I did this or how crappy I am or "there's always 2 sides to a story". (I'm not perfect nor do I claim to be.) But, what's his side of the story?.....I'll never know. He has not once communicated with me. #headinthesand
The good thing is this. I have so many friends who love me & show it. I have wonderful people who have stepped in as 'parent like' roles that I can talk with, get advice & depend on. I've said it before, I am truly thankful every day for my husband, kids & priceless people in my life that make my journey rich with love & laughter. I'm sorry RLT that you're missing out. #suxtobehardstubborn
The G Krew with their pet elephant
Friday, June 23, 2017
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About Me
- Courtney
- I am a wife, a mom, a daughter & friend trying to journey the best path in life. My goals are: Great wife, Fabulous mom, and Good community member. I am overly critical and hard on myself. I am fearful (like everyone else) & do my best to show strength. I am striving to be stronger, kinder & more understanding in my day-to-day life. I love my husband completely & love being on "our team" together. Another goal...get closer to God (or whatever you want to call him/her). I want stronger faith in my life & I have people who are inspiring me in that area.